Lyin’ ‘Bout My Rubber Size

25 Sep

Ok, so I’m glad to say that this is NOT something that I do now, but I also have to admit it’s something I did in the past, and I know it was wrong (and thank God it never came to anything) – and that’s intentionally buy a rubber that’s too big for me.

I’m not a pencil dick, but I’m also not a monster.  I’m perfectly average, like almost every other guy, and I have a li’l feller that more than gets the job done.  I like my guy.  We’re best buds.

But back when I was first getting laid, and buying my first condoms, I went into the stor eand got one of those boxes of rubbers for the “XL” guy – and I knew I didn’t have a huge dick.  (My balls are something else – I’m proud of those melons – but obviously you don’t put a rubber on your nuts.  At least I haven’t.  Hmmm…wonder how that would feel…?)

Anyway, I knew my dick was average, but I thought girls would be more impressed if I brought out the XL size sheath.  So I used them the first couple of times I had sex.

I am really lucky.  It stayed on (barely), but cum definitely leaked out of it, even though I pulled out as quick as I could after I came.  Probably the girls I was with were on the pill, and fortunately none of them had any diseases (and neither did I).

So I learned my lesson soon, and said, “Fuck it, I’d better be safe instead of conceited,” and got  normal, snug-fitting rubbers after that.

But I bet I’m not the only guy who has felt like he had to  build up his confidence by buying the wrong size “protection” – which could have had really non-protecting consequences!

9 Responses to “Lyin’ ‘Bout My Rubber Size”

  1. Scarlet Wilde September 25, 2012 at 11:39 am #

    As far as I know, they don’t come in different sizes in the UK. I wonder what that says about the differences in our cultures? x

  2. Panty Parade September 25, 2012 at 2:26 pm #

    I had a guy last night ask me if I had any condoms and when I told him I did, he scoffed because they were the wrong size. Kinda always felt that one size fits all, but I guess that’s not the case. Too bad they don’t sell them in variety packs.

    • ktz2 September 25, 2012 at 5:20 pm #

      I’ve been ‘following’– just want to tell you I get a great enjoyment from your wit and humor, mister.

      • mrguypants September 25, 2012 at 9:11 pm #


      • Panty Parade September 25, 2012 at 10:11 pm #

        I’m a woman.

      • ktz2 September 26, 2012 at 3:28 pm #

        to PantyParade-sorry – I was intending to make a msg to mrguypants only, and did it a wrong way I guess– BUT : I am now ‘following’ you as well, great posts.

      • Panty Parade September 26, 2012 at 3:41 pm #

        Awesome! That’s great news. Thanks!

  3. since im a poor fucker, the problem isnt the size, its about reusing them and repackaging them in my own brand. you can find them in your local salvation army store. thank you very much

    • mrguypants September 25, 2012 at 9:11 pm #

      I’ll be sure to lo9ok for ’em!

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