To Breasts

12 Sep

Remember the first time you saw a breast?

I don’t mean your mother’s from when you were feeding.  (For some reason, we always tease my bro Chunks by saying he was breastfed till he was 20; I don’t  remember why now.  Probably started when we were drunk.)  I mean the first time you saw one  up close and personal.  The first time you were making out with a girl and she let you go to second base and you were actually in someplace where you could SEE the heaven that you had maybe felt before and had maybe seen in silhouette or in glances of light, but had never really just been able to look at and gaze at and, let’s be honest, to marvel at and adore.

God, what a rush that was, wasn’t it?  Cuz let’s face it, a breast – a boob, a tit, a bazonga, whatever you wanna call it – a breast is a fuckin’ awesome thing.  And when you’re a teen-age boy (or however old you were when you first came eye-to-nipple with one), it’s entering a whole new world, and when you really SEE one, you just want to absorb it with your eyes.

Ok, you also want to squeeze it and bury your face in it and kiss and lick and nibble on it, to possess it – but before all that, you want to capture it forever with your mind’s eye, because it’s glorious and it marks a glorious moment, and shit, the sight of it makes you feel like you’re part of some awesome new world.

My first one belonged to MK.  We only went out maybe a half dozen or so times, and we weren’t either one of us interested in being any more than casual “lovers” (of the heavy petting kind).  I liked MK, but because she was my first real breast, she occupies a place in my memory that is hugely special.

When I’m ancient and decrepit and can’t remember my name or whether I’m Irish or German or what, I know I’ll still remember, very clearly, the beautiful sight of MK’s breast being released from her bra and presenting itself to me, a beautiful gift from the gods that I thank them for every day.

6 Responses to “To Breasts”

  1. Shane September 14, 2012 at 9:16 am #

    haha, “bazonga”

    • mrguypants September 14, 2012 at 9:26 am #

      Also like melonzillas.

      • Shane September 14, 2012 at 9:41 am #

        that’s a new one for me

  2. deafeningshadows September 20, 2012 at 5:36 pm #

    Reblogged this on Autumnus Et Matutinus and commented:
    Lol! I’ve never heard this perspective before, so this was awesome on a whole new level for me! I had no idea guys thought like this about breasts. SO worth the read!

  3. Balamaga Rogers September 28, 2012 at 9:33 am #

    Reblogged this on Balamaga Rogers and commented:
    “You also want to squeeze it and bury your face in it and kiss and lick and nibble on it, to possess it – but before all that, you want to capture it forever with your mind’s eye, because it’s glorious and it marks a glorious moment, and shit, the sight of it makes you feel like you’re part of some awesome new world.”

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