Me & Beer

22 Aug

Okay, it’s time for a big confession:  I like beer.  But I don’t know a good one from a bad one.

Oh, I know some that I like better than others, and some that I don’t like much at all (Molson’s, I’m lookin’ at you.)   But when I’m spoutin’ with other bros, and it all turns to beer, I’m fakin’ it.

Some guy will talk about how malty this beer is, and how grainy that one is, and so-and-so is all roasty and biscuity or piney or it’s so “you can taste the citrus.”  I don’t know what the hell he’s talking about.  Beer tastes epic or else  skanky to me.

And when they go on and on about how it’s made?  “Hey, this lager here is all fermented from Belgium” or whatever.  I don’t know how it was made, and knowing how it was made wouldn’t make me like it better or less.

On the MrGuyPants scale, I only worry about four things:

  • 1.  Does it make my tastebuds happy?
  • 2.  How much does it cost?
  • 3.  How much can I drink before I puke?
  • 4.  Does it make me look any sexier to the stacked redhead across the room?

Sorry – I’m a beer ignoramus. So you guys go on and hash it all out.  I’m going to go talk to the redhead.

9 Responses to “Me & Beer”

  1. Duma Key August 22, 2012 at 10:05 am #

    Lol that made me laugh… true !!

  2. fantasyfurnace August 22, 2012 at 10:55 am #

    Ever see this played out scene in the movies where you see a dude go up to a girl and ask “What are you drinking?” And she says “Beer”. So he goes to the bartender “Two Beers”. He never says, “Two Molson’s” does he? Beer is friggin’ beer!
    Nice post! (and thanks for the Like…)

    • mrguypants August 22, 2012 at 11:20 am #

      How could I not’ve thought about that before? So true.

  3. faramirtr August 22, 2012 at 7:50 pm #

    Haha… Good post… 🙂

  4. Jack Behne August 23, 2012 at 9:29 am #

    Nice post, but then you just liked a page in my ever so sophisticated beer review blog? Am very confused…:)

    • mrguypants August 23, 2012 at 10:11 am #

      I can’t explain why I like the beers I like – I can’t take it apart, the taste and all that – but it’s kind of fun reading about it. (But I get bored when I’m actually WITH guys who TALK about it – when I’m drinking, I usually wanna talk about something other than what I’m drinking.)

  5. jschoenberger August 23, 2012 at 8:42 pm #

    I’m with you on this. You either like a beer or you don’t. Sure, some nights will be a dark beer evening or fall under a category I made up (thick, bitter, etc.), but I’ll generally take whatever comes my way. And I hear you on the budget thing. $10 beers will never taste that good.

  6. Pdubyah August 31, 2012 at 6:42 pm #

    Reblogged this on Pdubyah and commented:
    I could have added to this, but na it’s a boy thing.. (optional)

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